


Please Leave a Message at the Tone

by BrokebackPurgatory



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Powers, F/F, Lena the model, One Night Stands, Sugarbaby!Kara, Wrongnumber!AU, expect a lot of dialogue, idk yet, maybe smut, romantic comedy thingy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-18
Updated: 2017-08-12
Packaged: 2018-12-02 19:31:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11515935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrokebackPurgatory/pseuds/BrokebackPurgatory
Summary: “Lucy! Fucking finally, I thought I was gonna have to call another hundred times. Listen, it’s Kara, my phone died so I’m using a phone in the bar, like, ya know, an emergency phone. Don’t worry, I asked the bartender and he said that it was fine. Apparently, he’s also the owner, so I guess I’m in luck today.Anyway, so I’m sitting at this bar down on 28th, I think it’s, like, The Tootie Fruity or something and this guy starts staring at me from across the bar, and he’s like, mediocre, but I’m sober so he’ll look better when I’m drunk, or something. And like, the whole reason I came here tonight was to get laid so I could move on and he’s the best looking guy here, which is not a high bar, but the point stands. Anyway, you’re usually the rational one about this, should I sleep with him?” Kara said, barely pausing to take a breath through the whole spiel.There was a pause on the phone. “Okay, one, that was a lot of words really fast, two, wrong number, and three, uh, you just called the dude kinda ugly twice. DO you really want to sleep with him?” Responded a pretty female voice.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Slide To Answer](https://archiveofourown.org/works/4433063) by [relenafanel](https://archiveofourown.org/users/relenafanel/pseuds/relenafanel). 



> Okay so I was listen to this song called Model Behavoir from Women on the Verge of a Mental Breakdown and that, forgetting to take my ADHD meds today, and this fic (https://archiveofourown.org/works/4433063) inspired me to write this AU. I read it a WHILE back and while I don't keep on on the pairing anymore, I LOVED the idea of this fic. Enjoy!
> 
> Also, the addresses don't mean anything. I just chose random numbers for them.

“Lucy! Fucking finally, I thought I was gonna have to call another hundred times. Listen, it’s Kara, my phone died so I’m using a phone in the bar, like, ya know, an emergency phone. Don’t worry, I asked the bartender and he said that it was fine. Apparently, he’s also the owner, so I guess I’m in luck today.

Anyway, so I’m sitting at this bar down on 28th, I think it’s, like, The Tootie Fruity or something and this guy starts staring at me from across the bar, and he’s like, mediocre, but I’m sober so he’ll look better when I’m drunk, or something. And like, the whole reason I came here tonight was to get laid so I could move on and he’s the best looking guy here, which is not a high bar, but the point stands. Anyway, you’re usually the rational one about this, should I sleep with him?” Kara said, barely pausing to take a breath through the whole spiel.

There was a pause on the phone. “Okay, one, that was a lot of words, really fast, two, wrong number, and three, uh, you just called the dude kinda ugly twice. DO you really want to sleep with him?” Responded a pretty female voice.

“Shit,” Kara muttered as she brought her hand to her forehead. “God, I’m sorry, who are you?”

The woman on the phone chuckled. “It’s no problem. I’m Lena.”

Kara smiled and let out a quick, breathless laugh. “Kara. I mean, I’m, uh, Kara. Listen, I really hate to bother you, but you sound about my age, and I kinda am having somewhat of a crisis and if you’re not too busy, since my wonderful friend won’t answer her damn phone, do you mind helping me really quick?”

A pause. Then, a startled, beautiful laugh came through the phone. Kara blushed out of both embarrassment and because the woman's laughter is some of the sweetest she’s ever heard.

“Oh god, I’m so sorry, that was really stupid to ask, I didn’t mean to bother yo-”

“No, no!” Lena said, laughing. “It’s totally fine! I’m not doing anything, and you do sound pretty panicked, and I’m bored, so what is this crisis about, anyway?”

Kara took a deep sigh and started in. “Okay, so I've liked this guy James for a solid year now, right? But he was with another girl, so I didn't do anything,  _obviously_ , I'm not for that, but they broke up, so I'm like, I'm gonna date this guy, and I do, I mean I go for it, I kiss him, he kisses back, it's great, it's awesome, blah blah blah. We end up going on one date, we don't even have sex, and I'm just like, 'I can't do this.' And part of me is like,  _'why the fuck not? This dude is awesome, and sweet and hot.'_ And another part of me is just 'I don't know, I just can't.'

So I broke up with him, and now I feel bad because he really liked me and he was sad when I broke it off, and I also feel bad because I've liked this guy for a  _year,_ and that takes up a lot of space in your head and your heart. It just feels empty right now, which is not a great feeling, so I'm thinking, okay, I do the classic rebound and get over it. Right?" But I'm not so sure if that would even help."

"Damn."

"Yeah."

"That is a crisis. I gotta agree with you on the end there. You gotta do what you gotta do, but in your situation, I'm not sure how much a one night stand will help you."

Kara sighed. "Yeah, you're right. I guess I'll go home."

"Okay, get there safely. Oh and next time, make sure the number's right."

Kara blushed again "Right, um, 'night."

"Goodnight, Kara."

Kara hung up the phone and slumped against the dirty wall. She's not really one for the bar scene, but she wanted to try  _something_ to help clear the emptiness. Although, speaking to Lena on the phone did kind of help, even if it wasn't purposeful. The loud bar was incredibly crowded, and filled to the brim of frat boys chugging beer. This bar was super close to a college nearby, and didn't tend to check IDs much, which is why Kara came here, because at every other bar, without fail, the always checked her ID at the door. She was twenty-six for god's sake! She may come back the next day, because tomorrow is gay night, which usually has better looking people, anyway.

Kara knows that a one night stand won't help, something the phone call hammered in even harder, but she can't help but wonder if maybe it was having sex with a guy that put her off tonight. Maybe a girl would help because they would remind her less of James.

Kara sighed and started out the door. She knew that even if she was willing to try again tomorrow, her night tonight was over. As she walked out the door, she heard a couple of catcalls which the owner promptly shut down.

Kara knew she liked this bar.

****

Kara was out again. She regretted it as soon as she tried to speak to someone. Their voice was always too high, or too stained, or _something_ , but every time someone spoke, she was immediately dissapointed.

"Vodka Cranberry," the bartender said, sliding the drink across the tabletop.

"Oh I didn't-"

"Compliments from the girl with the blonde hair," he said, smiling warmly and pointing toward the dancefloor.

The bar wasn't huge, and while the dance floor took up most of it, it was still small enough for Kara to easily spot the blonde girl undressing Kara with her eyes. The fact that she was extremely attractive helped.

Kara grabbed her glass and headed out onto the dance floor to meet the blonde. She saw her smirk when she walked over, and Kara actually felt somewhat excited that of all the people in this bar, this one had made her interest very clear.

"Hi."

"Hey," the girl purred. Kara fought a sigh. The voice was too rough. It sounded like the beach. She was looking for a voice that sounded like the calm waves. Nevertheless, Kara was going to peruse it anyway, because this was the only interest she had all night, even if it was diminished after hearing her speak, but damnit, Kara needed to get laid.

"Kara."

"Sara"

"Nice to meet you."

Sara grinned and pulled her onto the dancefloor. The danced closely together for about fifteen minutes before Kara heard Sara ask if she wanted to leave.

"Sounds good to me."

Sara grabbed her hand and lead her out of the bar in response.

****

As it turns out, Kara did not need a one night stand to get better.

In fact, it only made the whole thing worse because now she was in an unfamiliar apartment in a strange part of town. Kara want to get her phone to call an uber, but when she checked, her phone was, of course, dead.

Kara groaned. "Awesome," she mumbled sarcastically.

Sara was still passed out, for she had drank way more than Kara, who had only had half a vodka cranberry while Sara was fully drunk. Kara didn't want to disturb her, so she quietly collected her clothes and looked for a phone in Sara's apartment. Luckily, there was. A cherry red old rotary phone. Now that she looked around Sara's apartment, she actually saw tons of fun antiques from the later half of the 20th century. It was a kitschy little place with colorful wallpaper and fun lighting decorations. Didn't really seem to  match the girl the apartment belonged to. However, Kara was glad for it. It seemed like a miracle that the one girl in National City that Kara happened to sleep with liked antiques enough To own an actual rotary phone.

Normally, Kara would call Alex in this situation (Not that this really was a normality, in fact, this had never really happened to Kara. She had only had about two one-night stands in her entire life, and they both went back to her place, but Sara arranged the ride, so she didn't complain), but Alex was in Geneva for a science convention, so she decided to call Lucy.

"Lucy? Hey, good to hear you're _finally picking up the fucking phone_ , jesus, you act like it's _not_ surgically attached to your hand, or something," Kara said sarcastically. Normally, Kara wouldn't use sarcasm, but at this point Lucy hadn't pick up her calls or texts in like three days and Kara was starting to get annoyed.

"Wrong number again," said Lena, laughing quietly.

Kara let out a long sustained groan as she hit her head lightly against the wall. "Really? Again? God, _why?"_

 _"_ What has happened now?" Lena asked, managing to sound concerned with also stifling a laugh.

Kara combed through her hair with her fingers while explaining her current situation.

"Do you know the address you're at? Lena asked.

Kara frowned in confusion. "Ah, no, but I can check." Kara walked outside and checked the number beside the door, and looked down the road for the street name. "Um, 7745 98th avenue, I believe."

"And your home?"

Kara snorted "Um, that's creepy."

"Help me out here, Kara"

"Fine, it's 8692 54th avenue."

There was a pause on the phone, but then Lena responded with "You've got an uber coming your way. Keep on the lookout for a black Infinity QX80. The drivers name is Samantha."

Kara paused to take in the new information. Even after taking a minute she still didn't fully process what Lena had said. "Wait, huh?"

"I said you've got a black-"

"Well I heard you but how am I gonna pay for the uber? It's connected to a credit card."

"I've got the bill, Kara."

"Um, no, I cannot let you pay that, it's like, twenty dollars and I've never meet you and have no way of paying you back."

"Money's not a problem, Kara. I got the uber. Maybe you can repay me with a coffee sometime." Lena said. Her statement didn't end with a question, it seemed to end with a sly smile and a inside joke.

"Wait wha-?"

"Goodbye Kara, enjoy the uber," Lena said as she promptly hung up.

Normaly, the action would feel rude to Kara, it seemed to her that Lena was just trying to avoid more of Kara's protesting about the uber.

It was on the way home in the uber that Kara realized the voice she had been waiting to hear last night had been Lena's.

****

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Kara has no powers in this universe, but she still has those ARMS and I'm still gay so. So, 3.01 inspired me to continue writing because Lena was SUCH A MESS that I was finally like "okay I can write that".

Kara squinted at her ceiling and wondered about the consequences of possibly just skipping work and sleeping for another day or two. Then she remembered that Cat Grant would eat her alive, spit her out, and have the cleaning crew come in and sweep up her remains. So, deciding that she wanted to stay intact, Kara forced herself to get out of bed.

Before she did that though, she halfhazardly reached out to grab her phone. However, Kara did not have her glasses on, so instead of picking up her phone, her hand slammed into the phone and it flew into the wall, shattering with a day-ruining crack.

"Fuuuuuuuck," Kara groaned, closing her eyes and sinking further into her bed.

After wallowing in self pity for a solid ten minutes, Kara finally dragged herself out of bed. She picked up her phone to asses the damage, only to find it completely unusable. It was completely shattered, and she would have to replace it with a new one.

"Shit."

Kara sighed and got dressed. If she was going to have a shitty day, she might as well try and improve it, or at least get it over with. With that on her mind, she wears her usual sunny smile out the door exits her building and hails a cab to work.

***

"You look a bit frazzled," said Winn as Kara slipped into her seat.

"Shit, is it that obvious?" Kara asked, frantically smoothing out her hair in an attempt to look more professional.

Winn frowned and brushed down a cowlick, only for it to immediately spring back up again, much to Kara's dismay. She let out a groan and slammed her head on the table, right on to the keyboard. Unbeknownst to Kara, this left a grid-shaped pattern on her forehead.

"Keira!" Miss Grant shouted, clearly irate. Kara assumed her meeting with her mother had gone terribly, going by her tone.

"Yes Miss Grant?" Kara said, now standing in front of her bosses desk.

"Schedule an appointment with my therapist for 3:30 today, I have to pick up Carter," she said all while pouring herself a huge glass of m&m's, which Kara always found amusing to watch.

"Yes, Miss. Grant, right awa-"

"Oh, and Keira? Be sure to have your phone on you at all times today, I'm likely to be making plenty of calls while you're out picking out what I need you to. The list is on my desk, grab it and go."

 _Shit_ , Kara thought. How the fuck was she supposed to go through the day if her phone was completely eviscerated by her own cruel hand? 

Kara ran over to Winn's desk and started slapping him on the arm while rapidly repeating his name.

"Ow! What? What do you need just stop _hitting me_!" Winn said, pushing Kara off him.

"Look, if you have ever loved me ever, you will give me your phone."

"...what."

"Give. Me. Your phone," Kara demanded, holding out her hand.

"Why the fuck would you need my phone?"

Kara held out her destroyed one in response.

"Oh."

"Yes, Winn, _please_  give me the phone."

Winn didn't respond verbally. He just handed Kara the phone in a gesture of defeat. Kara hugged Winn and squealed as she walked in to tell Miss. Grant where she could be contacted from today. She didn't respond past giving Kara a look and taking the note with the number on it. 

After that, Kara quickly headed out of the office, rushing past the doors and trying to navigate Winn's phone to make sure that Miss. Grant's number would pop up with as a contact instead of a number. In her rush to get started on her long, _long_ list of errands Miss. Grant had set for her today, she ran into a woman coming out of the elevator.

Kara, mortified looked up to find the most beautiful woman she had ever seen, with dark hair and green eyes. The combined embarrassment from knocking her over and the general inability to speak around pretty women left Kara a bumbling gay mess. She helped up woman with immense apologizes on her tongue, only to find literally the most beautiful woman she had ever seen.

She had jet-black hair that curled softly at the ends and sea green eyes that seemed to shine like mirrors. _Great,_ Kara thought. _Not only did it steamroll the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, but I'm also waxing poetic._

The woman was wearing some dress with a white faux-fur coat in June, which Kara noticed with a laugh. Not that she laughed out _loud,_ or anything. She had already embarrassed herself enough today, and she didn't want to bring any more attention the the girl who nearly killed someone that looked to be a wealthy socialite or something. 

Kara heard the woman mumble something to the people surrounding her, and while her voice sounded vaguely familiar, she couldn't place it. Kara stayed for for a second to see if she could figure it out, but when nothing came to her head she just figured she was some actress she vaguely recognized, even if her brain told her she knew the voice more intimately than that.

Eventually, she shrugged off the nagging feeling and left to start on her list of infinite errands.

***

Kara was still sprinting around the city three hours later running errands for the Queen of all Media. If Cat texted and added another thing to pick up that was all the way across the city, she was going to throw the phone at a nearby building and fucking quit. 

On days where Kara was surrounded by huge buildings all day, she tended to miss Midvale and her foster mother, Eliza. She also missed Alex, but she missed Alex all the time since she left for the two week Geneva convention, leaving Kara alone in the huge National City. 

Kara lived in what was practically a one room shack of an apartment on the east (shitty) side of the city, and it was about all she could afford on an assistant's salary. most of the time, she stayed at Alex's huge apartment because Alex had never trusted the structural soundness of Kara's building, but Kara never really wanted to intrude if Alex wasn't home. Despite Kara's apartment being the shitiest thing ever, it was still so overpriced that the only thing Kara could afford other than food was like a a gram of cheap-ass weed she had for when the nightmares got bad. (Kara used to use vodka for the nightmares, but one particularly bad night lead to an incredibly bloated hospital bill that lead to some AA meetings and a serious talk from Eliza. After that, Lucy recommend she use some herbal medicine rather than a fermented one.)

This meant that instead of getting a cab or an uber like a normal person, Kara was forced to run around the city. On the bright side, Kara did get to see all the fun sights and the amusing people on her way from place to place. Plus, Kara almost always saw an assistant or two carrying eighty bags and trying to keep up a conversation with their boss. Kara had spoken to almost every assistant in every major corporation, and the interlocking assistant network in National City was amazing.

As Kara was walking though the tourist central of the city, she noticed a giant poster with the beautiful woman that she had knocked over earlier in a huge perfume ad. The perfume was named Rendezvous, and it had a soft red bottle with teal and gold accents. The poster had some cheesy slogan at the bottom promising everlasting sexiness or something if you bought the perfume. Looking at the woman's face on the poster however almost made Kara believe it.

***

"Saving up for a new phone is gonna kill me, Winn," Kara moaned.

She was back in the office (finally) and was lamenting to Winn about all of her new and improved problems for the week. It was an ever-growing list, and it was only Monday.

"Did you buy apple care?" Winn asked.

"Fuck no, that shit was like an extra hundred  _dollars,_ " Kara said, even though she now regretted the decision (Even if she couldn't have bought it anyway). "Oh, and did I tell you I trampled a celebrity this morning?"

Winn paused and raised his eyebrows. "No you did not."

"Oh I absolutely did!"

"Literally the only celebrity we've had in here today is Lena Luthor and if you knocked her down Cat would be coming for your neck. And how you even know it's a celebrity?"

Kara rolled her eyes. "Two reasons. One, because she was wearing a fur coat. It's, like, June. Two, because I saw her face on a big as poster today walking through the tourist trap."

Winn's jaw dropped. "Oh my god, you idiot you knocked over Lena Luthor!"

"Aparently! Also, who is Lena Luthor? Is she, like, a really big actress or something?

Winn looked like he wanted to slap Kara. "Kara, you work for Catco. How do you  _not_ know who Lena-fucking-Luthor is?"

Kara just shrugged.

 

 


End file.
